My colleague tends to be rather slack with her time and today, she decided to disappear mid-morning without telling anyone where she was going (and not for the first time either). About an hour had passed and she still wasn’t at her desk & I thought she was taking the piss (which she was- it wasn’t even lunchtime). So I emailed my friends, saying: ‘Where the hell is she?? She’s been gone for an hour!’
Imagine my horror when I got a reply from Ms Disappearing Act several minutes later, sniping at me to ‘mind [my] own damn business…!’
My stomach sank. I swore my eyes were deceiving me but no, her name popped up on screen, bold as brass in reply to my rant. Then I noticed she was staring at me, her eyes boring into my soul (she sits opposite & to the right of me). Fuckity-fuck! No escaping this. So I looked her in the eye as she felt smug at finding out my little secret (‘I don’t think you meant to send that to me,’ she squealed) and came up with some bullshit explanation that I was wondered where she was, like I was concerned for her welfare on the mean streets of London.
The two thoughts whirring round in my head at that moment were:
1. Flipping cheek of the woman to be so brazen in her reply;
2. You stupid tart- how could you be so slapdash and not check who you sent this to?
Oh, how she revelled in my discomfort- never will she let me forget what I did. Maybe she’ll set her horses on me…
My friend who I had cc’d in my email summed up the situation well, messaging me with the words, ‘Oh shit.’ I was vexed with myself because I always check who I send things to before sending. I half-expected her to confront me in the toilets although if she did, I’d tell her straight: why the frig did she think it was ok to bugger off during work time for ages without a valid reason? It wasn’t like it was her lunchtime (no, that would be too routine for her) and it WAS my damn business because if any of the managers called her, I’m not making up some crap excuse to cover her tracks. It’s not like she’d gone to the hub to fill up her water bottle- she didn’t even get me a Mars bar. The bint should have been at her desk!
She will probably be plotting her revenge this weekend and come Monday, I’m sure she’ll be telling certain people about the ‘incident’. Well, she can natter away all she likes. I’m not sorry- being called out for it (even though it was unintentional) might make her think twice about what she did, but I doubt it…she can be a bit dense.
So the moral of the story is thus: attention to detail is KEY, people. Any situation where you send an email and the unexpected response makes your brain freeze is not good.
© G. Holder 2012.