The Scarf

I bought a new scarf a couple of days ago. Lovely colour (wine red), good price and looks great, brightening up my cold winter days. But after two days of wearing it, I’ve become very annoyed with it. Bad scarf!

See, it’s one of those scarves where bits of material end up in the most random of places: my mouth, up my nose, in my ears. Little wisps of red all over the place. I put lip gloss on yesterday and it was like red tumbleweed had slapped itself on my lips by the time I got home. It’s the end of the day and I feel like I have inhaled half of my scarf, which makes my throat feel quite strange. Maybe tomorrow morning I’ll wake up and cough up a fur ball like a cat.

Why, as I type this right now (I’m on the Tube; I was sitting opposite a pair of annoying gum-smacking chatterboxes, now I’m opposite someone with a terrible pair of headphones leaking out some rubbish Chris Brown song) a few stray tufts have become attached to my already irritated nose. This is not good. I keep thinking people are looking at me, seeing stringy red pieces of material poking out of my nostrils, like fiery nose hairs.

The thing is this scarf is not made of wool or fur. If it was, I could understand why this happens but it’s acrylic! And this is not the first time an acrylic scarf has betrayed me like this. Some past ones were fine but others ended up shedding everywhere. One is not amused.

And yet in just a couple of days, I’ve become rather attached to my scarf. It’s all red and long and snug. But now I have to search for another one where I don’t end up inhaling half the material and hope for the best.

© G. Holder 2012

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