The Unfortunate Episode of the Filthy Fingernails

Apologies, as bad etiquette on public transport is starting to be a recurring theme on my blog, but I had to share what I had the misfortune of seeing this morning…

There I was standing on my bus when I heard the distinct sound of a nail being clipped. I turned round and before my eyes was a man clipping his fingernails on the packed bus. For the entire journey (a full fifteen minutes), I shuddered as he snipped off another piece and shook it onto the floor, oblivious to how rude and downright disgusting his actions were. He didn’t even stop when someone sat next to him.

And I wasn’t the only passenger appalled by his behaviour- several people looked like they wanted to say something, but of course we all let ourselves down by staying quiet and tutting instead. This entire episode of nastiness took place in full view of the bus driver, but the lucky woman didn’t notice as her eyes were focused on the road.

I mentioned this fuckery on social media and the overwhelming reaction was one of mutual disgust. Quite a few people had seen others doing the same thing. Someone even tweeted that I should (and I quote), ‘Set fire to the wanker’, but fire-based revenge has never been (and never will be) my style. All I wanted to do was tell him off and make him feel guilt-ridden.

So all you filthy sods out there who think that clipping your fingernails or- God forbid –toenails is a perfectly normal thing to do on public transport, you ought to be ashamed. Public transport is NOT your bedroom. How would you like it if I sat down and started cutting my toenails and shaking the remains into your lap? You’d hit the roof, even though I would call it karma. If you’re that desperate to give yourself a manicure then do it in the privacy of your home or a toilet. Otherwise I will shove your nail clip (and clippings) up one of your many orifices and no amount of trimming will help get them out.

© G. Holder 2013

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One thought on “The Unfortunate Episode of the Filthy Fingernails

  1. After nearly a decade of living in cities with great public transport, I’ve been back for a year in American car culture. I hate driving and often think fondly back on the subways and buses.

    Thanks for reminding me how disgusting it can sometimes be. 😉

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